WOWEE ZOWEE, THE BOARDS ARE ON FIRE: “On the boards” is fancy for “now playing on a stage near you,” and there’s God’s own plenty of live theatre happening in Birmingham right now, none of which, mercifully, is Oklahoma! There ain’t a damn thing worth seeing in the –er theaters (movies don’t matter much, evidently), but the –re theatres have got it going on. To wit: Faith Healer, opening next Thursday at the Alabama School of Fine Arts; Cabaret opening this Thursday at the Virginia Samford Theatre and I Am My Own Wife open already at Birmingham Festival Theatre.

Then again, if you prefer real-life drama, there’s the perplexing question of why Birmingham doesn’t have a redevelopment authority when it so obviously needs one. And then there’s the tragicomedy of the imminent mayor’s race. O! Would that this too, too sullied race would end and resolve itself into a new city politic…

Probably you spend too much time on MySpace to ever get to the theatre. J’Mel Davidson doesn’t have that problem. Neither does author and NPR commentator Roy Blount. Nor does anybody who reads the kind of book that Menasha Ridge Press has been publishing for the last 25 years. But should you venture out into the wild world, it’s worthwhile to make yourself an audience member at a local theatre. Make it dinner and a show — but consider eating vegetarian; otherwise it might be curtains for you.